Baby Sound Machine – Should you use one

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My sister came to help me right after my first baby was born.  Between having the baby delivered by Cesarean section, being asound machine first time mom, and having some anxiety issues due to the huge hormonal changes that had taken place in my body, I felt helpless.  She had already had three children so she seemed like an old pro at this baby stuff.  She came over almost every day for the first couple of weeks to give me a hand. 

I learned a very important lesson from my sister on the first day she was there.  I was only supposed to climb the stairs once a day to go to bed at night due to the surgery.  So I put the baby in her bassinet in a room just off the kitchen during the day for naps. 

The first time I put her down for a nap when my sister was over, I came out into the kitchen to where my sister was washing the dishes and I said “Shhhhhh the baby’s sleeping!”  My sister looked at me and said, “Are you nuts?!!!”

She then began explaining to me that if I kept the house silent every time the baby went to sleep, then I was going to have to keep the house silent  every time the baby went to sleep.  She explained that little things beyond my control like the telephone ringing or the doorbell etc. would startle the baby and wake her up if the house was silent.  Also, I would be limited as far as what I could do while she slept. 

My sister suggested that during nap-time and bedtime, that I throw a load of laundry in the washing machine, a load of dishes in the dishwasher, vacuum, etc.   So then any sudden loud noises wouldn’t wake the baby.  This advice always served me well with both of my children.  

In some homes where I babysit, the parents have actually purchased a Sound Machine to keep from having the infant sleep in total silence for the same reasons.  Many children still use them through the toddler and preschool years.

Some of these are called “white noise machines” and that’s exactly what they do.  They just make that fuzzy background noise that helps to blend louder sounds so they don’t startle a sleeping baby (or adult).

There are other types of sound machines as well, that have different settings for sounds like rain, a babbling brook, ocean waves crashing on the beach, etc.  Some even have classical music settings.

Some people argue that it makes the child dependent on sound to fall asleep.  But, by using the volume control, it should be very easy to wean a baby or child off the sound machine by making it quieter and quieter each night until it is no longer audible.

As I mentioned, a sound machine isn’t necessary; you can make background noise by simply cleaning the house or listening to music.  So, babysitters and nannies as well as parents, don’t feel like you have to tiptoe around the house once the baby or kids are asleep. 

Any type of noise in the background, whether it was the washing machine, dishwasher, vacuum, or music while my children slept, gave me the ability to get so much done without disturbing them.  Thanks for the words of wisdom Sis!

The Babysitting Lady

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Babysitting Tip – Go Above and Beyond

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Have you ever heard the term “going the extra mile,” or “going above and beyond the call of duty?”  Well, if you really want to impress  Girl in pjsyour babysitting clients this is what you’ve got to do, especially if you have a lot of competition.  If you think babysitting is just getting the kids to bed and then watching TV for the rest of the night, you couldn’t be more wrong!

If you truly want to make the most money you can babysitting and get the most jobs possible, then you need to be head and shoulders above the competition.  You need the kids to beg their parents to go out just so you can babysit!  You need the parents to be bragging to other parents about how they have the best babysitter in the world!  You need to actually be the best!

How do you do this?  First, always be on time.  Next, provide the best care you can.  Get trained in CPR and first aid if possible.  Always clean up after yourself, and be sure to play with the kids and interact with them.  Going above and beyond may mean doing even more than that.  Try bringing along toys to play with that you’ve purchased from a yard sale or that were yours as a child.  You could also try bringing items from your recycle bin to make crafts with.  But, going above and beyond may also mean doing something way out of the ordinary just to make the children smile.

I started babysitting for a family 8 years ago.  When the mother interviewed me, she let her 2 year old daughter sit in on the interview and was allowing her to assist in choosing a new babysitter.  The little girl chose me and told her mother that I was a real princess and that’s why she picked me.  So, after babysitting for about 8 months, I showed up one evening in a full skirted gown, my hair done up in a french twist, and a little Tiara comb in my hair.  The little girl was absolutely thrilled.

It’s been quite a few years since I pulled that stunt, so I went for the shock factor again the other day.  The mother asked me if I could babysit at 10:00 on Saturday morning.  “That’s really early for me on a weekend,” I explained.  “I might show up in my pajamas.”  She said, “Go right ahead, I’m sure the kids will love it.”  So I showed up on Saturday with my bathrobe over my clothes, slippers on, and curlers in my hair!  They were delighted!  “This is why we love you,” the mom said when she opened the door.

Lisa McLellan

Babysitting Expert

Babysitter Interview Question – Add this to your list

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crying babyIn my free eBook “Seven Things to Know Before You Hire That Babysitter,” I tell the story of how one of my babysitters left my infant son in his crib screaming and crying the entire time my husband and I were out.  Thankfully it was only a couple of hours, but still, the baby was very hot, red, and upset by the time we got home which tore at my heart.

After holding him for just a couple of minutes, he quieted right down, although he still made a little gasp sound every now and then for the next 15 minutes or so the way kids do who have been crying for an extended period.  He just wanted to be held.  If only the babysitter had picked him up, I’m sure he would have stopped crying.  Instead, she unplugged the baby monitor so she would not have to listen to him.  When the battery backup kicked in, she shut it off.

My advice to any parent of an infant/baby that is interviewing potential babysitters is to ask them what they would do if the baby starts crying.  Also, don’t accept just one answer.  After the sitter replies, ask what she would do next if that did not stop the baby from crying.  You can ask this three or four times or even more.  In my article, Baby Won’t Stop Crying, I give over ten reasons why the baby may be crying and suggestions on how to quiet her down.

Leaving a baby screaming in his crib for two hours is certainly better than shaking or hurting the baby, but knowing what to check for or what to try to soothe a crying baby is much better!  When searching for a babysitter, keep your standards high, your children are worth it!

Lisa McLellan, Babysitting Expert

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What to do with All Your Children’s Artwork

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Almost every kid enjoys drawing, painting, or doing some type of craft project.  But after even just a few months of making crafts at daycare, school, or preschool, your child may have created far more masterpieces than your refrigerator or counters can hold.  And after a year, you may feel like you need to put an addition on the house just to display these amazing works of art.  Then add any projects created with the babysitter or nanny and soon you’re buried.

What do you do when you’ve run out of space, but either you don’t have the heart to get rid of these creations or your little one bursts into tears as soon as you remove one from the refrigerator?  My suggestion is to let the artwork be displayed on the refrigerator or counter for maybe a week or until the next masterpiece comes along.  Then, take a photo of every work of art before taking it down. Next, invest in a digital picture frame and load it with photos of your child’s drawings and art projects.  Then keep it on the counter or in another highly visible spot so that you can display every masterpiece your child has ever created in a very small amount of space.

Now you can store the original artwork away in bins if you choose, and your little Picasso need not be upset because his creations are still clearly displayed for all to see!

Best of luck,

Lisa McLellan,

Child care expert

Babysitters Beware

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baby cryingMost babysitters or nannies never think to ask parents how the appliances, thermostats, or baby gadgets work.  It may not matter much if you can’t work the oven unless you were asked to make dinner for the children.  And if you were asked to make dinner, that may remind you to ask how the oven works.

If you’re babysitting late and the automatic thermostat turns the heat down to fifty eight degrees after the children go to bed, that could be a bit of an issue.  You may get very chilly if the parents aren’t due home for a few hours.  But, that is easily solved by a sweater in your bag or a blanket on the sofa, or you could even wrap yourself in a beach towel or large bath towel if nothing else was available.

But what happens when you strap the baby into a high chair, carriage, car seat or other piece of baby gear and then you can’t get her out?  Before you laugh this off, go by a store that sells baby furniture and accessories and go around to each display item and try to open and close it, buckle and unbuckle it, or turn it on or off.  You may be surprised at just how complicated these devices have become.  If you try this and have difficulty with any of them, imagine how difficult it would be if there was a crying baby involved.

Before you attempt to restrain a baby in any type of swing, high chair, car seat, carriage, etc., be sure you know how to get her out quickly, easily, and safely.  If you do have trouble undoing a belt, buckle, or harness and the baby is screaming and crying, keep your cool and try not to let the baby’s cries make you panic.

Keep in mind that yanking or pulling harder is not usually going to help.  Many buckles require you to pinch or squeeze the buckle or latch before pulling it out of the connector.  If you absolutely cannot figure it out, stay calm and call the baby’s parents or your parents for help.

Remember to ask parents to show you how to use each piece of baby equipment even if it looks simple.  Try opening and closing, buckling and unbuckling with the parent there.

Best of luck and happy babysitting!

Lisa McLellan
Child Care Expert
Nanny Services

 

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Sneak Out or Leave Them Crying

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Many “experts” have said that parents should never sneak out when the babysitter takes over.  They say you should always say good bye.  This is one of those things that is often more easily said than done.  And, it is one of those things that I disagree with.  As with most situations, I feel there is no right or wrong answer, you have to do what works  for you.

When my daughter was little, I tried several times to just say good bye and leave.  She screamed and cried for me as I walked out the door.  Even though I knew she would stop shortly after I left, the image of her reaching for me with tears streaming down her face and the sound of her cries stayed with me for so long afterward that I was unable to enjoy the adult time with my husband and friends that I so desperately needed.

The next time my husband and I left her with the babysitter, I explained a couple of times during the day that the sitter, Hannah, was coming to play with her while Mommy and Daddy went out for a little while.  I told her that Hannah would play her favorite game, read her some stories and put her to bed, and when she woke up Mommy and Daddy would be there.

That evening when Hannah arrived, she took my daughter by the hand and said, “Let’s go play dolls!” and led her into the playroom.   My husband and I quietly slipped out with the sounds of a giggling happy little girl in the background.  I was completely able to enjoy myself and my daughter didn’t shed a tear!

When we returned home, I asked Hannah how it went.  She told me that shortly after we left, my daughter asked for me and Hannah simply told her exactly what I had told her earlier and then distracted her with another game.

After just a few times of slipping out, my daughter was practically shoving us out the door so she could play with Hannah.  Then we were able to give her a kiss, say good bye, and leave her with the babysitter without any tears or negative feelings.

If you do choose to say good bye and leave even if your child cries and begs you to stay, you can take comfort in knowing that almost always within just a few minutes your child will calm down, stop crying, and begin playing.

While I don’t feel that there is a right or wrong way to depart, I do advise against trying to negotiate with your child when you’re trying to leave.  If you tell your child you’ll bring them home a surprise if they don’t cry or they can watch their favorite video etc., you will probably need to negotiate every time you leave even long after the child has learned that you always come back.

Lisa McLellan

Child Care Expert

Nanny Services

 

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Babysitter Safety

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Unless you are working as a “mother’s helper,” you are probably alone with the children that you are caring for.  During the day, this may not Babysitter safetyseem like such a big deal, but if you are babysitting at night it can get a little scary sometimes.

Here are a few safety tips to keep in mind when you’re babysitting:

  • Always lock the doors after the parents leave.  Locking all windows, at least on the first floor, is a good idea as well.  Ask parents to leave a key if you are planning on taking the children outside.
  • Do not open the door for anyone unless the parents have told you to specifically.  For example, they may have told you Aunt Sara was coming by to pick up the cake in the refrigerator for a bake sale, or a family friend named “Tim” will be over at 6:00 to pick up Bobby for hockey practice.
  • Ask the parents if it’s alright to let their answering machine pick up calls so you don’t have to let callers know you are there alone.  If the parents need to get in touch with you and you don’t have a cell phone, ask them to call the house, let the phone ring once, then hang up and call back so you know it’s okay to answer.
  • Before settling down to play with the children, check the house for safety hazards.  Just because the parents haven’t corrected a safety issue, doesn’t mean it’s safe!
  • If you need to use the stove to prepare food for the children, be sure not to let any pot handles protrude over the front of the stove.  Turn all handles to the side. Use back burners whenever possible.
  • If you take the children outside to play, be sure that their shoes are tied and laces are not dragging.
  • In houses where “baby gates” are used, try to remember to open them correctly as opposed to stepping over them.  Though stepping over them may not be a hazard for you, children may try to imitate you and can get seriously injured trying to climb over a gate especially if it is on a stairway.
  • Keep volume on televisions and radios turned to the lowest comfortable setting so you can still hear what is going on in other parts of the house.
  • Be sure you know where the emergency phone numbers are located.

When working as a babysitter, keeping the children safe is your main duty.  Following these simple safety tips should help you to excel in this position.  Best of luck, and stay safe!

Lisa McLellan

Child Care Expert

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But My Parents Always Let Me!

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This is a phrase most babysitters hate to hear.  When a child wants to do something that the babysitter feels is unsafe, inappropriate, or  just not allowed and tells the child “no,” she is often met with the immediate reply “but my parents always let me!”  If you are a babysitter and you have had this happen, what did you do?

Any time I find myself in this situation, I always give the same response.  I say to the child, “maybe your parents DO allow you to do that/watch that/eat that etc., but they didn’t let me know that it was okay.  So just for tonight, you need to do something else/watch something more age appropriate/eat something healthier for snack.  When your parents get home, I’ll check with them and make sure it’s okay.  If they say yes, then you can definitely do that/watch that/eat that the next time I come over.”  Then I immediately distract them.

You will be amazed at some things that kids have permission to do because perhaps you were not allowed to do the same things at their age.  But, it is their parent’s who make the decisions for their children and you need to respect that.

Once when I was babysitting a 6-year old boy and his little sister, his mom said they could have either yogurt, fruit, or peanut butter crackers before bed.  When bedtime came, the little boy pulled a chair over to the counter and began climbing up to reach candy in the cabinet.  When I told him that candy was not an option for snack, he told me he was going to rip my head off and stuff it down my throat!  I guess you could say that was a bit of a variation of “but my parents always let me.”

He once again headed for the candy shelf and once again I calmly took him down and told him that candy was not one of his options.  I explained that I would check with his mom when she got home and if she said it was okay, then the next time I babysat he could have it.  This was one time when that technique didn’t work. When he attempted to get the candy one more time, I told him in a much more stern voice that candy was not an option for snack and that he could have yogurt, fruit, or peanut butter crackers, or he could go to bed without any snack.  He chose yogurt!

 

Lisa McLellan

Child Care Expert

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What To Do When Baby Won’t Stop Crying

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crying babyA baby’s continuous crying can make even the most laid back person frazzled.  The reason? It’s supposed to!  A baby can’t speak yet to tell you that she is hungry, needs a diaper change, or just wants to be held.  The only thing she can do is cry.  Nature made that sound irritating so it would get a response and the infant’s needs would be met.

In order to get a baby to stop crying, you need to know the reasons why a baby might be crying.  Below is a list of circumstances that may be the cause of a baby’s tears.  For more details on this list, please see my complete article at http://www.babysittingworld.com/cryingbaby.html .

 

  • Baby is hungry
  • Baby is tired
  • Baby’s diaper needs to be changed
  • Baby has gas/baby needs to burp
  • Baby just wants to be held
  • Baby is teething
  • Baby is over stimulated
  • Baby is bored
  • Baby is uncomfortable

So once you’ve tried picking the baby up, giving her a bottle, pacifier or teething ring, changing her diaper, and playing with her  to no avail, what next?  Sometimes just simply picking the baby up isn’t enough, but she may quiet down if you walk around with her and bounce her very gently and maybe even sing quietly or whisper to her.  If she is old enough to hold her head up on her own, try holding her facing outward with her back against your chest.  Put one arm around her torso and the other through her legs supporting her bottom .  Babies are very curious and like to look around.

On the other hand, if baby has had too much stimulation, she may need to be rocked in a room with dim lights and perhaps a white noise machine or fan running on a low setting just for the sound.

Check to see if baby is uncomfortable by touching the back of her neck to see if she is too hot or too cold.  Try taking off all of her clothes including her diaper to see if any of them may be too tight or irritating her skin.  If baby is still crying and you have experience bathing babies, try a warm bath.

Newborns often like to be swaddled.  Being wrapped snugly in a blanket makes them feel secure and may calm them down.  On the other hand, some babies hate feeling confined and may need blankets or clothing loosened up.

Try a ride in the car or a walk in the stroller.  Most babies love the motion and quiet down shortly after you start moving.

If all else fails and you are feeling overwhelmed or getting extremely irritated, put the baby in her crib and go to another room so you can still hear her faintly through the walls or through a monitor but so you can relax for a moment and regain your composure.  If you are a babysitter, you can try calling the parents to see if they have any other suggestions.  NEVER shake a baby, no matter how frustrated you feel.  Shaking a baby can cause harm or even death.

Once you have regained your composure, you can pick the baby back up and start from the top of the list.  By now, baby might be hungry and want that bottle.   The most important thing you can do is to stay calm.  The baby will eventually stop crying.  While there is an exception to just about every rule, I don’t think there has ever been a baby that has cried forever!

Lisa McLellan

Child Care Expert

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Babysitting Tip #2 – Dealing with Negative Behavior

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At some point, if you babysit often, you will probably come across a child that behaves negatively for one reason or another.  If you yell and scream and get upset, you might make things worse.  Sometimes kids fight with another child over a toy, sometimes they are just tired and sometimes, they just want attention.  And to many children, it doesn’t matter if it is positive attention or negative attention, they are still getting attention.  So by getting upset and yelling, you are giving them just what they want.

If two children are fighting over a toy you can try a couple of different things to end the dispute.  First, you could try letting the child who had the toy first use the toy for 5 – 10 minutes.  Set a timer and let that child know that when the timer goes off it is the other child’s turn.  More often than not, the child using the toy will lose interest long before the timer goes off.  But if not, set the timer for the second child so the first one can have another turn with the toy after.  Go back and forth until they both lose interest.  No matter how special the toy, it isn’t usually long before they have both moved on to something else.

Another resolution would be to offer a reward to the one who gives up the toy and lets the other child use it.  Rewards come in all shapes and sizes.  A reward can be something like letting him pick the bedtime story, putting polish on her fingernails (if it’s okay with the parents), playing a card game with just him, or doing a puzzle with just her.

Though it sounds too simple, distraction is an amazing tool!  It works well for anything from school aged children arguing, to toddlers touching things they aren’t supposed to.  All you need to do is have something interesting to show them or let them touch or use.  Almost all children love flashlights!  Bring a flashlight in your babysitting bag not only to use if the power goes out, but to play shadow games when you need a distraction.  Other items that are great for distracting kids of all ages are tiny crank handle music boxes, kaleidoscopes, balls that light up when you bounce them, bubbles, magnets, and dominoes.

Instead of yelling “NO, NO,” or “Don’t touch that” to a toddler heading for a glass vase, pull out your flashlight or bubbles (etc.) and say “Hey, look at this!”  For older children, intervene by simply saying something like, “Hey do you guys want to make Oobleck?”  (Oobleck is made of just cornstarch and water and it is REALLY COOL!  Look it up on the internet.  It is easy to make and kids love it!)  You can also try asking if they want to play a game like Simon Says, Charades, or I Spy.  Break out the crafts!  You don’t need to spend money on craft supplies, just bring a bag of things like paper towel tubes, string, elastic bands, old greeting cards, all types of small boxes, dry macaroni, drinkable yogurt containers, paper plates, glue, tape, and some crayons.

Lisa McLellan

Child Care Expert

 

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